


Twins

by CompletelyDifferent



Series: Steven Universe One-Shots [33]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Ableism, Gen, Identity Issues, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-22
Updated: 2017-08-22
Packaged: 2018-12-18 15:18:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11877276
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CompletelyDifferent/pseuds/CompletelyDifferent
Summary: Their first night among the Off Colors, Rutile and Rutile try and sort some things out.





	Twins

**Author's Note:**

> Based on a prompt by AiramCG: The Rutiles have a Fight

The Rutiles sat in the back of a hole meant created by another Gem, legs pressed against their chest, one arm wrapped around each.

They didn’t speak.

One kept her head down, eyes pressed tightly shut. They other stared forward. Out of the little cave, she could see the dim, grey expanse of the kindergarten stretching out before her.

That’s what she’d be looking at. For the rest of her life. _That_.

She wondered what the surface looked like. She wondered what color the planet’s sun was. How tall the buildings were. What it was like to walk among them. To have a job, and the chance to do it, to fulfil it. To have other Gems– other Rutiles– look at her, and wave at her, and _smile_.

She glanced over at the other Rutile, head still bowed.

_This is your fault_.

Maybe she accidentally said it aloud, or maybe the other Rutile _felt_ it, the thought passing silently between them, because her head snapped up. “It is not!”

“Yeah it is!” Rutile said. “If you weren’t here– if you’d just come up properly– we wouldn’t be stuck down here!”

“Me! Maybe you’re the one who came out wrong!”

Rutile crossed her arms over her chest. Or, well, Rutile crossed one. The other Rutile crossed the other. They couldn’t even cross their arms properly.

Anger, resentment, frustration, despair– it all welled up in her. Or, no, in them, deep in their core, the bit of their gemstone that they shared, and that just made it even worse.

She couldn’t even have her own _feelings_.

The other Rutile looked away. “I hate you.”

Rutile rocked back as if slapped. “Well, _I_ hate _y_ –”

“Stop.”

The voice was soft, and quiet, and it made Rutile stop.

It belonged to Padparadscha Sapphire, climbing up into the hole. She was frowning, and even though they hadn’t known her long, it had been long enough to tell that this was unusual.. “You’re going to insult one another,” she said. “You shouldn’t.”

Padparadscha climbed in properly, and even though there the hole wasn’t very big, she could fit.

“Well,” said Rutile.

“Why not?” finished the second.

There was a long, drawn out pause, one which made Rutile’s fist clench and Rutile’s foot tap.

“Because you don’t hate each other,” Padparadscha said. “Or at least, you shouldn’t.”

The Rutiles' mouths pressed into thin lines, and neither said anything.

“What happened to you is neither of your faults. It’s just a thing that happened.”

Maybe that was true. But that didn’t make them feel any better.

And what did Padparadscha know about this, anyway? Rutile wasn’t like her. _She_ was completely whole, completely competent.   _She_ didn’t spend her whole life living in the past, barely able to function–

_That wasn’t very nice_ , Rutile thought, and the accompanying guilt belonged to both of them.

Then came Amazonite’s voice, slow and steady. “Fighting will not help.”

Unlike Padparadscha, Amazonite most definitely could _not_ fit inside the hole. She was _huge_. Something to do with being a ‘fusion’, which neither Rutile still really got. Instead, she remained outside, a single eye peering in, patient and sympathetic.

Rutile didn’t want sympathy. She huffed. “It sure makes me feel better.”

“For now,” Amazonite said.

“But if you just make yourself angry and depressed, that’s all you’ll ever be,” said Padparadscha, after another one of those delays. “The key to a happy life is a positive outlook.”

“Easier said than done,” quipped other Rutile, and Rutile couldn’t help but give a sardonic smile in response.

“You’re partners,” Amazonite said. “You share a body, and to a certain extent, a mind. To live happily, you will need to work together. Take it from me.”

“Is this…” Rutile began, and Rutile finished, “A fusion thing?”

“Yes. I am one person, made up of five others.” She stepped back, tapping each of her gemstones systematically. “Being like this isn’t always easy. We don’t always agree, and I have given up a lot to be who I am. But it’s worth it.”

Rutile leaned forward. “And you were made this way?”

Amazonite slowly shook her head. “No. And I am sorry that you do not have the same chance to choose that I do. But you can still make the best of a bad situation.”

(”No, no, Amazonite chooses to stay fused,” Padparadscha explained, belatedly.)

“But it’s _worth it_ ,” Amazonite repeated. “To have someone there who will always be there, who you know you can trust, completely and utterly.”

Rutile looked at Rutile, and Rutile looked back.

She could remember– they both could– those first moments of existence. That understanding of ‘ _I’m me; we’re us!_ ’ Working together to push out of the earth. That shared pain at the expressions on the others’ faces, their screams as they’d run away. And then the two of them, running in the other direction for their life (lives), moving in perfect harmony, legs pumping, arms reaching. How they’d ran and ran and ran, until they’d gotten lost in the old tunnels. How they’d worked together to make their gem light up and guide them. How they’d clutched at each other’s hand for comfort. Their shared joy when Amazonite and Padparadscha had found them and taken them in. When the two other Gems had embraced them without any fear or hatred at all.

“Sorry,” Rutile said, wiping away a tear.

“I’m sorry too,” Rutile agreed, reaching her arm over to give Rutile a hug.

And the twins smiled at each other.


End file.
